I don't think it has really set in completely. She was in my seminary class last semester. I'm not going to pretend we were best friends, because we weren't. Yet I can't lie by saying we were not friends because we were.
When I first got the text about Kat, I didn't think I knew her. Kat from seminary never crossed my mind. I searched the year book but she was not in there. I searched facebook and I couldn't find her. I tried many spellings of her last name and finally found her. I clicked on her profile picture and immediately knew I knew her.
I went upstairs and sat on the ground. It didn't seem real. Things like this don't happen to 16 year olds in Provo. They just don't.
Tara, the student body president, called me a few minutes later to check up on me. Thank you Tara. You are so kind.
Kat was super cute and super small. She was very sweet and got along with everyone she met. (At least that was how it was in our seminary class) She had this cool, skater attire going that I have always wished I could pull off. She was a joy in 5th period.
For a short time during the semester, we missed her from class a few times. One day on my way out of school, I said, "Kat! We miss you in seminary!" "Thanks," she replied with a smile. Next class, she was in her seat, eager to learn. I don't know why she was gone for those few times and I don't think it was because of me she came back but it made me happy that she was.
After we got new seminary classes I did not see her very much. I'd pass her every now and then in the hall but that's it. I wish I did more.
Every time someone I know dies, I re-examine my life. Am I happy? Am I doing what I need to? Who knows how long I have. How long everyone has!
I read an article by John Bytheway and in it he said, "The best way to prepare for death is to live life to the fullest." And I think that when you loose a loved one, there is sorrow on Earth but joy in heaven.
We'll miss you Kat.
I knew Kat from one of my classes, as well. I only knew her for the few weeks I had transferred into the class, but it was enough for me to appreciate her and I totally know what you mean! She was nice and undemanding in that kindness. There was a memorial at school today for her... it was one of the most moving things I've witnessed. Thanks for putting up your post : )
ReplyDelete