Sunday, February 28, 2010
Wow children! This is my 201st post AND my blog has been alive for one year and 6 days! (I missed it's real birthday, isn't that sad?) Oh well! It's okay. I will most definitely make up for it by sharing a few gifts with you!
My sister always picks a birthday song for her birthday and it's not typically 'Happy Birthday'. It's kind of like a theme song. For sha-sha-speaks' birthday song I have chosen.... Hey, Soul Sister by Train. Music video: here. (There's an add before it and then the music video will start.) Depsite my love of the song, I do not love the lead singer's pants.... perhaps I will write him a letter of concern or perhaps I will just deal with it. At this point, I do not know. ps. I feel giddy today and so I will also share the song 'Marry Me' by Train as well. Music here. j'taime la song.
Next! My favorite recipe site. Because you're a blogger, chances are you a very familiar with NieNie. Well did you know she has a recipe blog? (Chances are you did-but if you did not...) I love CuisineNie!!!! I love to cook... have I told you that? Well I do. Unfortunately, I do not do it too often but when I do, it's like a different world. I feel warm and peaceful. Good combo if you ask me.
Last but not least.... um... I love you? Does that work as a gift? Because I think it does. I hope it does. (February is love month, I'm sad there are only 11 hours left of it.) But if not, how about one of my favorite general conference talks? It's a good one. I promise- if you are LDS, or if you are not, I think this talk is relevant to everyone. It's about love. Everyone loves love. Read it here.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
ps. The character "Des" is in fact "Desmond" from LOST. I could not resist.
Scene 4- Speakeasy
Clarence walks in, obviously discouraged and sits down at the bar.
Clarence: Hit me.
Des: What can I get for you brotha?
Clarence: Something strong. Really Strong.
Des: Coming right up.
Des, the bartender, prepares a drink for Clarence.
He hands the drink to Clarence.
Des: What’s on your mind brotha?
Clarence: Is it that obvious?
Clarence drinks the entire glass.
Des: Well most people who come in here in the morning normally have a reason to be here.
Clarence: (chuckles in self pity- the affects of the alcohol are kicking in) Another one of those please.
Des prepares another glass.
Clarence: Hey, I have a joke for you.
Des: (handing Clarence another drink) Hit me brotha.
Clarence: What do you say to a cow that crosses in front of your car?
Des: Moo-ve over.
Clarence: (slurred) Geese Louise. Umm Mr...
Clarence: (slurred) Misssssster Des.
Des: Listen brotha. Is it a girl?
Clarence: (slurred) Yoooou betchya.
Des: You obviously care about her, so what are you doing here? I suggest you go and get her.
Clarence: Yah, yah! That’s what I should do. Right now.
Clarence tries to stand up, but falls over. He gets up again and runs out the door as he yells,
Clarence: Here I come Opal!
Des: Other door brotha!
Clarence comes out of that door and runs through the correct door as he repeats himself.
Clarence: Here I come Opal!
Scene 5- Martin’s house
Clarence comes running to the front door.
Clarence pauses for a moment and presses his ear to the door. Martin is speaking on the phone.
Martin: (in a high pitched- girl voice) Hello?... Hi. This is Opal Wilder and I just wanted to make sure my thousand dollar life insurance was still in place-… oh it is? So if I just (pause) bump off any time soon, my kin will collect the dough?... (back to a normal voice) WONDERFUL! (clears throat—back to a high pitched-girl voice) Excuse me, I mean, Wonderful! It’s so nice to know my loved ones will be taken care of if anything should happen to me… you too. Thank you.
Martin hangs up.
Martin: (talking to himself) Let’s see here… Now all I need is to get her to the alter and give her the arsenic and then one thousand dollars is all mine.
Martin looks around.
Martin heads to the front door.
Clarence runs behind a bush.
Martin opens the door and sees no one. He goes back inside.
Clarence comes out of hiding and says:
Clarence: I’ve got to go warn Opal!
Martin comes behind him and knocks him out, drags him into his home and begins to stuff him in a wooden chest when Opal comes up to the door.
Opal: Yoohoo! Martin dear! It’s me! Opal!
Martin: (in forced calmness) Just a minute dear! I’m just making some… java!
Opal: Oh! Okay…. But can’t you open the door first and then continue making the java after?
Martin is still trying to hide Clarence in the chest.
Martin: Um, no. Making java is an art.
Clarence begins to come to.
Opal: Oh! Um… alright!
Clarence: Opal! Opal is that you?
Martin hurriedly places his hand over Clarence’s mouth. Clarence is struggling.
Opal: Clarence? Is Clarence in there? Well you can tell him, I don’t want to see him!
Martin: No. No. No. Clarence is most certainly NOT in here.
Clarence bites Martin’s hand on ‘NOT’ and Martin squirms.
Opal: Martin. This is ridiculous. I’m coming in!
Opal shoves open the door. By this time, Martin has forced Clarence almost all the way into the wooden chest. A wiggling foot is hanging out.
Opal: Oh my heavens! Is that a-a-a foot?
Martin elbows the foot in the chest and locks it.
Martin: So darling, what can I do for you?
Opal: (shrugs it off) Well tonight, there’s a party at Betsy’s and I was hoping you would accompany me!
A sound comes from within the chest.
Martin hits the top of it and smiles innocently.
Opal: Martin. What’s going on? Let me see what’s inside that chest!
Martin: NO! I mean, there’s nothing- it’s nothing. Shall we go to Betsy’s?
Opal: (hesitant) Sure… alright.
Martin escorts Opal out the house quickly. They both exit.
Meanwhile Clarence is still in the chest. He rocks it back and forth. It tips over.
Clarence: Oh bother.
Scene 6- Martin’s house. Later that night.
Martin and Opal come through the front door. Both exquisitely happy.
Martin: Opal. You are truly amazing.
Opal: Oh shucks Martin.
Martin: No, I mean it. Which is why I need to ask you something.
Opal: Anything Martin!
Martin: Will you marry me?
Opal: (obviously in shock. Clears her throat) Um. Martin, would you be so kind to get me a drink please?
Martin: (taken aback) Certainly.
Opal looks around and goes to the chest. She knocks on it.
Opal: Um. Excuse me? (There’s no answer) Hello? (still no answer. She turns the case the right way up. Takes a deep breath and opens it. She screams when she sees Clarence. He is asleep.) CLARENCE! Clarence wake up!
Clarence comes to.
Clarence: Opal! Where am I?
Opal: Did Martin do this to you?
Clarence: Martin… martin…. YES. MARTIN! (Clarence screams. Opal screams. Clarence screams. Opal screams)
Martin comes into the room with a drink for Opal and screams.
Clarence and Opal turn around and scream when they see Martin.
Martin: (flustered) Clarence! What are you doing in that chest?
Opal and Clarence look at each other. Bewildered. They break eye contact and Clarence says…
Clarence: Martin. I know about your plan. (to Opal) Cover your ears, my darling girl, you’re not going to want to hear this.
Opal obediently covers her ears. Clarence gets out of the chest to tell Martin the following:
Clarence: I know that you were planning to marry Opal and then kill her for the life insuarance money!
However, we cannot hear it because Opal’s covering her ears. We only see a mouthing and rather animated Clarence.
Opal uncovers her ears.
Opal: Is it safe?
Clarence: Yes, my darling girl. We are leaving.
Martin stands in front of the door.
Martin: I’m afraid that’s not an option. I guess I’ll just have… to kill you both.
Opal and Clarence gasp.
Suddenly and without warning, Des the bartender breaks down the door with a gun in one hand and a police badge in the other.
Des: Martin Widmore, You’re under arrest for the attempted murder of Opal Wilder and Clarence Jones.
Martin immediately puts his hands up.
Des: (to backup) Cuff him boys.
Backup obediently cuffs Martin and they exit.
Clarence: Des the bartender?
Des: Why yes that’s me brotha. Undercover bartender but still…
Opal: Oh thank you! Thank you so much! What can I ever do to repay you?
Des: How bout you marry this man?
Opal turns to Clarence and he is on one knee.
Clarence: Opal Wilder. Will you marry me?
Opal: YES! Of course I will marry you!
Des: All in a day’s work brotha.
While still in an embrace, Clarence begins to speak.
Clarence: Hey Opal-
Clarence: Knock knock…
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Clarence is pounding on the door.
Clarence: Martin! Open up! We need to talk!
Martin’s inside his house, sitting at a table, reading a newspaper.
Martin: I can’t hear you!
Clarence: Don’t be a baby Martin. I know you’re in there.
Martin: Oh Clarence. Just give up already. I’ve obviously won Opal over.
Clarence: No you haven’t. You’ve just caught me in a series of bad days. That’s all.
Martin opens the door, and speaks to Clarence face to face.
Martin: A series of bad days? A series of bad days? (laughs) That’s not likely. What I have observed is a lack of character. You, Clarence, are nothing but a pile of horsefeathers. Opal will never take you back because you are a liar, fish murderer, most certainly not a doctor… and you have skinny legs.
Martin slams the door in Clarence’s face. Clarence stands there, stunned. He attempts to say something back, but nothing comes out. He eventually storms off stage, silent.
to be continued...
Opal comes on stage in her pajamas and heads straight to the door. She opens it. Lying there is Clarence.
Opal: Clarence. Clarence! CLARENCE!
Clarence wakes up suddenly.
Clarence: Opal! So lovely to see you so early today!
Opal: Well I didn’t have much of a choice you were sleeping outside my door.
Clarence: Right. About that… I just wanted to find out how last night went at the speakeasy but I came over at about 5 this morning and I realized you probably wouldn’t be awake so I just camped out here!
Opal: I can see that. It went well thank you.
Opal tries to close the door but Clarence stops her.
Clarence: (he stands up) Oh come on Opal. You can’t be mad at me just because I didn’t like your cake.
Opal: You’re right. That’s not the ONLY reason I am mad at you. You also killed Genevieve. Remember?
Clarence: If it helps, it was fast. Practically painless.
Opal’s jaw drops and she slams the door.
Clarence speaks through the door.
Clarence: What do you have if an ax falls on your car?
Opal: (irate as she opens the door) Oh let me guess! An AX-ident?
Clarence: (stunned) Yes actually. How’d you know?
Opal slams the door again and begins to pace.
Clarence continues to speak through the door.
Clarence: Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
Opal: (still pacing. still irate.)Actually there is! How about you bring Genevieve back to life?
Martin appears out of no where.
Martin: (rather pompously) Did someone say life?
Clarence: Is that Martin in there?
Opal: Martin! How did you get in here?
Martin: (rather self righteous and arrogant) I just did!
Martin: I am… a DOCTOR!
Clarence: (aside) Of course he is.
Martin: I can revive life with the touch of a finger! Where is the poor soul?
Opal: Genevieve? She’s over here.
Opal shows Martin a small black box.
Martin: Stand back! I need space!
Clarence: What is he going to do? Give it mouth to mouth?
Sure enough, Martin begins to give the late Genevieve mouth to mouth and CPR.
Clarence: Why is no one answering me? Does that mean he is?
Clarence gives up and sits down on the door step.
Opal is in shock as she watches Martin perform CPR.
Martin: BREATHE LITTLE FISHY! BREATHE!
One last mouth to mouth later, Genevieve jumps out of Martin’s hands and now into her now water filled bowl.
Opal: Martin you did it! You saved my baby!
Martin: (wiping his hands off) Oh it wasn’t me, it was the doctor in me.
Clarence raises his hands in the air in disbelief.
Opal: Oh that’s so romantic!
Opal is now clinging to Martin’s arm as he smiles a Superman smile off into the distance. Clarence is now banging his head on the door in self pity.
to be continued...
Thursday, February 18, 2010
by Yours Truly
Scene 1- Opal’s House.
Phone rings. Phone rings again. And again. Finally OPAL comes rushing on stage in an apron with flour on her nose.
She makes her way over to the phone. Before she picks it up, she takes a deep breath.
Opal: (pleasant) Hello, this is Opal speaking. (listens carefully)… Whose there?... Orange who?.... (SUDDEN burst of laughter) HAHAHA! Oh Clarence you slay me!
OPAL plops on the couch by the phone
Opal cont: So you know, I was thinking (pause) we should go out tonight…. You’re busy? (Opal’s face falls)… A present?... Where?... On my door step? Hold on a moment, let me go check.
OPAL puts down the phone and goes to the door. She opens it, and standing there is CLARENCE.
Opal cont: CLARENCE!
They embrace. While still embracing they begin to speak.
Opal: I’ve missed you so much Clarence!
Clarence: I know my darling girl.
Opal: It’s been, what? Two- maybe three…. hours?
Clarence: I know my darling girl.
They release each other and Opal turns away flirtatiously.
Opal: So Clarence… what do I owe this pleasure?
Clarence turns away flirtatiously as well.
Clarence: Does a keen young man such as myself have to have a reason to visit his doll face?
Clarence and Opal’s heads turn to each other at the same time. They run to the middle of the stage. Come to an abrupt halt and then hug again. While in an embrace they speak.
Clarence: Did you hear about the wooden car with wooden wheels and the wooden engine?
Opal pulls away from the hug.
Opal: No. What are you talking about?
Clarence: It wooden go!
Opal: (sudden burst of laughter and enters back into the hug) Oh Clarence! You are the bee’s knees!
Still in an embrace.
Opal: Oh! I need to show you what I made!
Clarence: I’d love to see it my darling girl!
Opal: But that means I must depart- but only for a few seconds.
Opal: But I must!
She pulls away from the hug, arms out in front of her, walking backwards (so facing him) as she goes off stage.
Clarence checks to see if the coast is clear. He pulls out a ring from his pocket, looks at it, and then brings it up to the light when he accidentally drops it into a nearby fish bowl. Clarence is horrified. He runs to the bowl and puts his hand in, searching for it.
Clarence tries to get his hand out but he can’t due to his hand being clenched in a fist. Reluctantly he let’s go of the ring and slides his hand out.
Opal: (from off stage) I’ll be right out dear!
Clarence, startled, jumps.
Clarence: (in forced calmness) Take your time doll face! Take all the time in the world! You have plenty of time! Really. PLENTY of time.
He lets out a nervous giggle and gets back to work. He studies the fish bowl for a moment and then suddenly, and with out warning, dumps out the fish bowl contents onto the floor- pebbles, water, fish and all. He runs his hands through everything.
Clarence: What? No.
He’s scrambling now. There is no ring in sight. Clarence spots the fish.
Clarence picks up the fish.
Clarence: (menacingly) Give me the ring or I will-
He pauses with anger and begins to pound the fish on the floor. Over and over and over…Opal walks in with a large, lumpy, and quite ugly looking cake.
Opal: WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO GENEVIEVE?
Clarence: Your fish is named Genevieve? I mean- it-it-it was… choking!
Opal: Do you think I’m a dumb dora? Even I know fish don’t choke!
Clarence: No not at all. My apologies my darling girl.
Opal: Now put her back in the fish bowl. NOW!
Clarence carefully puts Genevieve back in the waterless fish bowl.
Opal: (still a bit upset) Now. I baked us a cake.
Clarence: I see that my darling girl!
Opal: (handing Clarence a fork from her apron) Would you like a bite?
Clarence: Of course my darling girl.
Without hesitation, Clarence digs in and begins to chew. His face changes from a smile to a look of disgust.
Opal: Oh no! Do you not like it?
Clarence shakes his head and forces a smile.
Opal: You’re lying. You hate it!
Opal turns away from Clarence with her arms crossed.
Clarence looks around, sees a plant and spits it out.
Clarence: No it was wonderful. Ab-so-lute-ly swell!
Opal: I don’t believe you. (Still turned away from Clarence.)
Clarence: But it’s true!
Opal: Prove it.
Clarence: How do you expect me to do that?
Opal: Take another bite.
Clarence: (slightly higher voice than usual) Is there… any other way?
Opal: (turns to face Clarence) CLARENCE!
Clarence: Alright my darling girl, alright!
Clarence slowly points his fork towards the cake and begins to get a piece of cake when… there’s a knock at the door.
Clarence: (under his breath) Thank heavens.
Opal: Did you say something?
Clarence: Me? No. Nothing.
Opal goes to answer the door. MARTIN enters.
Martin: Good day Opal!
Opal: Good day Martin. What can I do for you?
Martin: I was just in the neighborhood and thought I’d stop and say hello… (clears throat) Hello.
Opal: Well hello! Would you like some cake? (she goes to get the cake) Clarence here doesn’t like it.
Martin: He doesn’t? Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.
Clarence: That is not true. I love it. Best cake I’ve ever had.
Martin: Are you calling Opal a liar?
Martin: Oh. I just thought you were implying…. (Martin trails off and takes a bite) Oh my stars. This is scrumptious!
Opal: (to Clarence) See?
While Opal says, “See?” Martin spits out the cake into a near by plant.
Clarence: Wha- (gestures towards Martin)
Martin is smiling innocently.
Clarence: Martin, would you please excuse us for-
Martin: Actually Opal. You caught me. I did come here with an alterior motive.
Clarence: I beg your pardon Martin but I really do need to talk to Opal alo-
Martin: I was hoping you might accompany me to the Juice Joint tonight.
Clarence: Are you out of your mind? Opal is not a dumb dora. She’s never done anything illegal in her li-
Opal: Actually Clarence. I can make my own decisions thank you very much. I would absolutely love to accompany you tonight.
Martin: Pick you up at 8?
Opal: 8 it is!
Martin exits smoothly.
Opal turns to face Clarence.
Clarence: (cautiously) Before you say anything rash, let me just say the following: How does a flea get from place to place? (Opal does not answer) By itch-hiking! Get it? ITCH-hiking?.... No?
Opal: Clarence! I’ll have you know: First! I have been to a speakeasy before thank you very much.
Clarence: Alright, well, I don’t think that’s the best idea Opal.
Opal: And second! Fish have feelings!
Opal rushes off stage in a huff.
Clarence: (to himself) Fish do not have feelings. Do you Genevieve. (he notices there is no water in the fish bowl) Genevieve!
to be continued....
dun. dun. dun.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Sunday, February 14, 2010
I can't help it.
I'm as cliche as it gets.
But I LOVE Valentine's Day.
Valentine's day is my holiday.
It's full of love, happiness, and candy! (Non chocolate ones for 2010 but still.)
Yes, yes, I know. I may be special someone less- come on, I'm 17- but you can still celebrate it and be happy about it! Instead of devoting this day to runny mascara and kleenex, why not devote it to your parents, siblings, or besties!
I am planning to paint my nails red and pink and make a special Valentine's Day treat.
YAY YAY YAY! Love you all so much!
Friday, February 12, 2010
My days are full of dance. Dance company is preparing for our concert which on April 29th and 30th. MARK YOUR CALENDARS! It's going to be amazing. I'm already feeling really good about the dances. I'm working harder than ever and even choreographing a dance to the song, "Both Sides Now" by Joni Mitchell. It. Is. Hard. I've laid awake in my bed many nights thinking and worrying about my dance. And it's only February. Yikes. I am in seven dances including dances to this song (however, the music video for this one makes me dizzy) and this song (I like that music video). I'm pumped.
Other than that I have been watching LOST, and in a way, I just need to finish it so I can get on with my life. It consumes me. No joke! But part of me knows that as soon as I get caught up, I'll just start over from the beginning again. I need to join a LOST anonymous group or something. Soon.
I'm sorry I've been gone for so long. Blogs are boring if you don't publish a post often. I will try harder. Love.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Today is opening night! HOORAY! However, not for a show I am in, but for a show my father has directed! Yay Papa! The show is "Jonah and the Great Fish," (starring David Osmond and Katherine Nelson) written by none other than my Daddy. You see, my Dad is a busy man. He writes and directs a series of musicals called, Liken the Scriptures (click on this link here) and this is the first time they are doing one on stage. (Clarification: others have been put on by wards and stakes etc- one was even in the Philippines- but this is the real deal.)
The show is INCREDIBLE. Believe me, I know. So buy your tickets HERE! It will be well worth it. Also, this is my Daddy's blog link if you want to find out a little more about him. He's a cool guy. I'm his number one fan so....
Okay Paps! I'll be rootin' for ya! I love you so much and Break a Leg!!!!